Aries 21st March - 19th April
Don't look a gift horse in the mouth, especially one with extremenly bad breath Try having cornflakes for dinner.
Lucky Architecture: Rococo
Taurus 20th April - 21st May
Great minds think alike, but fools seldom differ. Either way you'll be accused of plagiarism Try having gammon and pineapple for elevenses.
Lucky Philosopher: Socrates
Gemini 22nd May - 21st June
It's an ill wind that blows no good. Especially after eating beans. Try having suckling pig for brunch.
Lucky Author: Tolstoy
Cancer 22nd June - 23rd July
Recall that a fool and his money are soon parted. Send your donations to me. Try having spam for a mid-afternoon snack.
Lucky Artist: van Dyck
Leo 24th July - 23rd August
Too many cooks spoil the broth. Try using about one and a half. Try having prawn curry for dinner.
Lucky Composer: Berlioz
Virgo 24th August - 23rd September
You will be encumbered by a cumbersome cucumber. Try having a bacon sandwich for brunch.
Lucky Composer: Chopin
Libra 24th September - 23rd October
You will drink a cup of tea or coffee today. Or maybe a glass of water. Try having lasagne for afternoon tea.
Lucky Artist: CÚzanne
Scorpio 24th October - 22nd November
Your bad breath will cause the extinction of a rare species of woodlouse. Try having sausage, egg and chips for afternoon tea.
Lucky Author: F. Scott Fitzgerald
Sagittarius 23rd November - 21st December
A long lost tribe will be discovered in the Amazon who have been worshipping you as a god for several generations. Try having tomato soup for a snack between meals.
Lucky Author: Hemingway
Capricorn 22nd December - 20th January
Apparently his bark is worse than his bite. Try having beans on toast for dinner.
Lucky Artist: Klimt
Aquarius 21st January - 19th February
Birds of a feather flock together. They also fart together, but that seldom makes the news. Try having steak and kidney pudding for a mid-morning snack.
Lucky Epoch: Miocene
Pisces 20th February - 20th March
Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise. However, you will miss out on a lot of fun. Try having bacon and eggs for a late evening snack.
Lucky Bones: Phalanges